Happiness
“Happiness, happiness, the greatest gift that I possess”
This line is taken from the song “Happiness” sung by Ken Dodd and written by Derrick Anderson. It was a minor hit single in 1964 apparently. Well before my time but my Dad used to sing the first line, over the years I came to the conclusion he didn’t remember the rest of the song!
But it’s true though. Happiness is the greatest gift any human can possess.
There’s another line further along in the song:
“Happiness is a frame of mind”
True, although personally I think happiness is a state of being.
The actor Will Smith said this. “Your happiness is your responsibility”.
This is his full quote:
“her happiness is not my responsibility. She should be happy and I should be happy individually. Then we come together and share our happiness. Giving someone a responsibility to make you happy when you can’t do it for yourself is selfish”
You can make another person smile, you can make another person laugh but you cannot make another person happy.
It’s not on you to make anyone happy.
You cannot find happiness outside of yourself. “Shiny objects” (whether the object is a thing or another human) do not bring you happiness. They satisfy ego in the short term, but it is not happiness in the long term. We all know the novelty wears off & we go looking for something else.
Likewise you cannot “find” happiness. I said earlier I believe happiness is a state of being. Happiness is created. Humans can create anger in a stupidly short time span – almost instantaneously. Yet the creation of happiness seems a hard thing to do.
Or is it really?
Listening to the rain whilst I’m inside warm & dry – creates a cozy happy feeling inside.
Listening to my son laugh uncontrollably – feels me up with amazing feelings inside.
Watching something that makes me laugh so hard – creates a warm fuzzy feeling inside.
The feelings created from just a few of my favorites are what I hold close. I let those feelings grow & grow. For when those feelings grow I am truly happy & content. Those feelings, like seeds, are cultivated. Sometimes it takes a little work and when done the rewards are beautiful. Yet humans don’t do it. Humans go for the quick fix in life.
Quick Fix
One quick fix, in my humble opinion, is positive thinking. I can’t speak for any other human but for me I can think all the positive thoughts I want, I can say all the positive affirmations I want but if I do not truly feel the thoughts or the affirmations then it’s a pointless exercise.
It’s not about positive thinking. It’s about actions.
It is not physically possible to be happy 100% of the time. Things knock us in life it’s the way it is. However, what humans do have is another gift. Humans have the gift of free will & can choose how to respond to what happens in life. The action taken as a result of that response is what drives the next step.
For example, I sent a message to a friend I hadn’t heard from for a while. We’d both been busy & time slipped by when I realized I’d not been in touch. I sent her a message telling her how much I valued her friendship & even though we’d not spoken for a while she was in my thoughts.
It made me feel all tingly inside. Those warm fuzzy feelings I guess! I didn’t want anything in return, it was sent straight from the heart with nothing attached other than a whole lot of love.
She messaged me back 2 days later saying she really appreciated what I said, she’d had a rough week with one thing & another & to know someone was thinking of her made the world of difference.
Her message made me smile. All I wanted was for her to know I was thinking of her. Simple.
What action could you take to cultivate that warm cozy, fuzzy feeling? Notice how it feels inside.
But know this. It doesn’t have to be an action for someone else or towards someone else. It can be an action for YOU. Really notice how THAT makes you feel.